Spring Break Day 3

When I know I will have both kids at home for a week, I like to plan activities. I prefer to get out of the house in the morning, come back for lunch and Teddy's nap, then do something in the neighborhood or in the house during the afternoon.

Day 1 was tide pools and park in the morning and the elementary school playground in the afternoon. Day 2 was supposed to be Teddy's Little Gym class (Sam plugged into iPad) and the store in the morning and the backyard in the afternoon, but the kids (and I) were all grouchy, so we only went to the store in the morning and then yelled at one another in the afternoon. Oh yeah, there was pushing too - that was fun. Day 3 was supposed to be the aquarium in the morning and art projects in the afternoon.  The boys LOVE the aquarium. I think Teddy asks to go to the aquarium every single day - it's either that or "a journey." (As in, "Mommy, can we go on a journey?")

8:00am
Me: (to Sam) You should get dressed and brush your teeth now so that we are all ready to go to the aquarium! I'm packing the sn....
Sam: I don't want to go to the aquarium.
Me: What? Why not?
Sam: It's raining. I like to go when it's sunny.
Me: But, we often go when it's raining. The aquarium is inside. It doesn't matter if it's raining. It is good that it's raining.
Sam: I just don't want to go.
Me: (interior monologue) What is it with children this age and the word "just"? Like that explains or excuses anything! I just poked my brother's eye out with a stick! It was just an accident! (aloud, trying not to sound shrill and desperate) But, what will we do here all day?

This is when I started to feel optimistic. I have an arsenal of activities. We could easily take up the whole day with art projects and a couple of TV shows. No problem. This will be great.

10:00am. I realize that I have looked at the clock a million times during the previous 15 minutes. I realize that I have forgotten all I know about children and activities, namely, that they will work for three minutes on something you thought would take an hour. After breakfast and getting dressed, we have already colored, painted, played with Legos, and rejected several of my suggested activities. I am in the weeds and the kids' voices are sounding SO LOUD and SO ANNOYING. And I realize that I have yawned, like, a million times in the past five seconds. HOW IS IT ONLY 10AM?????

Me: Who wants a snack?

...

5:00pm. After breaking up the 17th brother brawl today, I plug each into his own screen so I can make dinner. Then I pour myself some vodka and soda on ice, but it's missing something. Hmmmmm ... some blood orange sorbet? This actually makes it into my drink and I merrily make dinner!

6:00pm. Over dinner.
Teddy: (to me) You're my best friend.
Me: Thanks, you're my best friend too.
Teddy: Let me see your chompers.
Me: (bearing teeth) Eeeeeee.
Teddy: Those are beautiful.
Sam: I see a cavity.
Me: Those are fillings.
Sam: (to me) Can you cry and get angry?
Me: (fake wailing) Awwwwwww! I made this bread from scratch and no one says 'thank you'!!!!!! Awwwwwwwww! No one appreciates meeeeeeee!!!!
Teddy and Sam: (in unison) Thank you, Mommy, for this bread and spaghetti.
Me: Oh, you are welcome.
Teddy: Can I have another fluffy one?
Me: First, you have to pick up the crusts you threw on the floor.
Teddy: I make a pile!